Today my son is 5 years old.

I remember he wanted to come out 3 months early. I was on bedrest until my scheduled C-Section 1 week before his due date. He came out crying and flailing - perfect. He seemed so much bigger than the other babies there.

He was my "earth baby". Breastfed on demand for over 2 years, cloth diapered, with me in the sling everywhere, in our family bed, no bottles, no cow's milk til he was 3, homemade babyfood. He loved the park swings and being anywhere with his sistersHe walked at 9 months, spoke words at 12 months. His favorite thing was (and still is!) water - the beach, baths, and jumping into grandma's pool, pouring cups in his kiddy pool. He has never stopped being curious, silly, precocious, proud, and so happy and healthy.

I thank God every day for my kids. Each one makes my life full and meaningful. I have learned so much from them. Happy birthday, my sweet boy. He celebrated his birthday at school today. We brought in Munchkin donuts and I got to see a little of how the preschool day is run. The teacher read a story about St. Patrick's Day. Her grammar was atrocious. She asked the kids, "Where do you see the 2 boys is?". What....The....Fuck???? Ok, I understand she's Filipino and English is not her first language, but Jeez! This is what my son is learning?! Then during "carpet time" they sang the ABCs. W was so bored he didn't even sing. At one point she asked me if I'll be sending him to Kindergarten or keep him home. I told her I didn't know yet. She said W is very smart and homeschooling is good for smart kids. The aide said they learn socialization here - how to follow rules like raising their hand, sitting still, being quiet, walking in a line. Um, yeah, okay - they learn how to play the game of school. The other kids were cute. One girl snitched on someone every 5 minutes. One boy wouldn't leave J alone. One girl kept asking W if she was still his friend. One boy came out of the bathroom all unzipped and unbuttoned. No one gave a shit about the story or the sitting on the "blue oval" part of the carpet with their legs crossed. But W likes it. He basically only likes 1) showing off the toys he brings in to the other kids and 2) being given "jobs" like opening the other kids' milk cartons, tying the other kids' shoes, and going to the office with the aide.

Oh, and by the way, this will be his last year of institutionalized school. Yes, I have made the decision to homeschool him. I still have to discuss this with B and W, but I have no qualms about it anymore. My mother even thinks it's a good idea. She finally sees. Her main concern was W not being with other kids, but she started asking about our homeschool group and knowing that there are over 100 families in the group (with many many other 4-7 year-olds) was the turning point for her. B will be easy to convince. W will agree to it once I start taking him to hs group events and out into the world.

School has become such a joke. I care way too much about my kids' futures and well-being (socially, academically, mentally, emotionally, etc) to have them go through endless years of potentially harmful mediocrity. K has to come to the decision on her own. Mom even asked me if K wants to homeschool. I explained that K has a fake, idealized, TV version of high school in her head. Mom said that maybe she won't like it after a year or so and can come home. I was like, - who are you and what did you do with my mother?

W has been given a better birthday present than he'll probably ever realize. He's a lucky kid.