Saturday, October 07, 2006

K stayed home from school yesterday, so we all went to Michael's Craft Store to buy a bunch of craft stuff. The kids went through our books looking for fun things to make, so we made a big list of supplies and spent about $70. At home, the girls cleaned the kitchen (??) and made these amazing potato-onion-cheese stuffed pastries. Then we drove to dance, picked up B, and I went to work.

Today, J had rehearsal for an evening performance in Staten Island at a Light the Night fundraiser. I left work at 4:30 to get to S.I. by 5:30. The performance was great and it really brought a tear to my eye watching J out there giving her all and loving every minute of it.

K enjoyed the day as well, meeting up with our cousin (her age) who just happened to be there. K is still having a rough time with her school friends, though. She was all ready to go back to school Tuesday, but spoke to someone on the phone today who revealed that all the girls involved in the "incident" are saying K is the one who initiated the whole thing. She was so confused Thursday when she went to school and everyone ignored her (which got her so upset I had to go pick her up) - now she sees why. And now she is once again saying she never wants to go back. I spoke to my mom about this and she's angry and upset about it too. Mom is actually saying I should keep her home. I don't know what to do. I'm not prepared for it. K is scheduled to take the TACHS exam next month for Catholic High Schools. She's supposed have all these so-called "friends" at her Confirmation party in 3 weeks. Now she's not talking to any of them. I feel like she is making a rash decision, but I don't want to throw her back to the wolves and face this awful rejection and misery. I read Reviving Ophelia and Queen Bees and Wannabees. I knew some girls who cut themselves, some who were very promiscuous, and some who were borderline junkies. All of them escaping something and not having anyone who understands or helps. K has a need to be accepted. She always has. She tends to migrate toward the bad-populars. Even as far back as 2nd grade. There is nothing I can do to help her now - except to understand she needs to be away from the pressure. Not just the trouble she's going through now, but the pressure of the whole facade of being cool and perfect all the time at school. She calmly and maturely told me she would like to start homeschooling.

Maybe I should start listening...

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